I get it now

[tephra]

I used to be a bit puzzled by people that get depressed about their birthdays. I'm not anymore.

Comments

[watanukisuki.livejournal.com]

Not to be irritating or pry, but what's up? Which part of "bithdayness" is depressing?

Is it the "one year closer to certain death" aspect? Or the "ZOMG! Look at that hottie Japanese high school kid who is old enough to be my son" aspect? Or the "OMG, I can't believe I ate the entire cake" aspect? ;)

*an inquiring older mind wants to know*

And since you don't list it in your user info anywhere, when is your birthday? It's hard to wish goodness and happy on birthday people if we don't when to do so. ;)

*hugs just because*

[tephra]

I really try to ignore the fact that classmates of mine from highschool have kids starting college this fall. By ignoring that I can feel slightly less perverted about my anime crushes because most of the time I don't think about my age and default to "old enough to drink legally in the US". ;D

No, it's just the whole "I'm 34 and I've accomplished nothing of value in my life and didn't live up to my potential, blah blah blah" crap. It's convenient date for the depression to pounce on like the beginning of a new year or the end of an old one.

Today.

[watanukisuki.livejournal.com]

Today is also officially Spring in Japan. A time of renewal and change. :)

I know my words are little more than that, but don't be so hard on yourself. Life itself is valuable... just in the living. And unless you're super religious and have beliefs otherwise, aren't you the only person who can decide the value of the life you lead? And on whose standards to you base "value"? Because I don't have 1.4 kids, a dog, a house in the 'burbs and an SUV, does that mean my life has no value? There are all sorts of people leading all sorts of lives... valuable lives, so don't use societal norms or someone else's definitions to judge yourself. Unless that's the sort of person you want to be, ruled by other's judgements.

Isn't there value enough in living a good life and trying to find your own happiness? ^_^

*hugs* Happy birthday! Don't let it get you down. Or if you do, make sure it's cute and has chocolate. ;)

[tephra]

Timezones are neat, Japan gets spring a day early. :D

Religious, moi? Surely you jest! *laughs* Don't want the kids, prefer my cats, wouldn't mind having my name on the house but really, living in a house in a rural area is just my thing without the legal obligations, have the SUV (need it to deal with the snow, OMG stop snowing already!!).

I'm just feeling the lack of steady decent income pretty hard and it's bleeding all over everything else really messily these days. Wouldn't hurt to be able to use my brain in whatever job came with the steady and decent income but I don't really have the luxury of holding out for that. I definitely need to stop hearing I'm overqualified to stock shelves. Debts care not about qualifications, they just want money.

It lacks the cute, seriously.

But yesterday involved Chinese food, beer from the local microbrewery, and (chocolate) cheesecake so it definitely improved in the evening.

[bearybipolar.livejournal.com]

ah,the thirties,i think i rememember them. :)

lots of birthday wishes for you over in SBP_Graphics!

The Beast(Depression) is a formidable foe.
I wish you luck in fighting Him/Her.

[tephra]

The thirties snuck up on me, I swear I was still under 25 last week! :D

The Beast is a Bitch. And probably rabid.

[toshirodragon.livejournal.com]

I remember my thirties... so I plan to BLAST through my forties and rip a wide swathe into my 50s and 60s

I figure my birthday's coming whether I get depressed or not.. so I might as well save my depression for the frackin plumber's bill!

[tephra]

I think the bills are where it's all coming from really, just leaking into other stuff.